By Desmond Morris

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People, who, with gentle hands and warm chests, stroked their full-bodied, mildmannered, and gentle-voiced pigeons, as though pigeon and person nourished each other, as though they understood each other’s longings. Call it what you want, but consider: those believed to be sane among us show similar devotion to our dogs and cats. As domesticated pets do for domesticated people, wild pigeons do for wild pigeon people: make them happy. And peaceful, it seemed. St. Francis, though, just threw and threw and threw, fistfuls of seed, quickly, and then, before pigeons swarmed down from their sooty, dark ledges, she left, her umbrella poking the concrete alongside her strident footsteps.

In fact, the city below you would almost disappear. Given the opportunity to look beyond the familiar concrete scenery, you could, with this temporary reprieve from the purely urban, imagine the island of Manhattan three centuries ago, thickly forested and ringed with lime green marshland. Meanwhile, the MetLife peregrines would keep circling you, assessing you, calling to you: kek kek kek kek. Assuming you would welcome it, the mantra of the falcon would rap in your head and slowly you would sense yourself entering, or at least reaching, into something wild, something your body senses, responds to, knows.

But the situation presented itself as a fascinating and insistent question: beer or tuna, beer or tuna, which is best loved? the hopes of snakes Repeated trials proved, come morning when results were tallied, that more roaches were stuck to the double-sided extra-strength tape on, as I remember, the beer bowl, which, we pondered, could be meaningful research for fraternity houses. Eventually, my boyfriend and I decided we had roaches for real, and the source of the problem was a very old woman, the superintendent said, living directly two floors below us.

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